Talk
BRO. AUDEE VILLARAZA:
Happy New Year, Feast!
I want to lay down the foundation of my talk first.
Quick question: How many of you are ready and fired up for this year?
I’m sure you are. And you know, a lot of us, whenever we enter into a new year, we’re ready to leave behind everything else last year. And I’m sure you’re ready to leave behind, you know, moments of failure, moments of mistakes, stuff that you want to leave in 2023.
But may I negotiate with you just a bit? You know, sometimes, I feel like in our excitement, we miss an important step that God wants us to take — before we leave the previous year. Because He transforms us in that process.
What do I mean by that?
Let me just share something very personal and private. This message I’m bringing this to you is somewhat of a struggle because, during our break in the last two weeks, I was praying whether I would share this or not. And God compelled me to do it.
Were you here during our Feast on December 17, 2023, where I announced that I’m going through a personal crisis, a midlife crisis? You remember that?
Oftentimes, you will never hear people announce that, much less even acknowledge it before a thousand people. And that’s what I did.
But there’s a reason I needed to do that. What is funny is that whenever I would prepare a talk, I would gravitate toward a topic that already happened. I would talk about challenges that I already defeated, trials that I already overcome, battles already beaten. But in this case, this trial is something that’s happening in my life.
Midlife Crisis
The reason I’m sharing this is I believe that we bond in weakness, never in strength.
Let me say that again: we bond in weakness, never in strength. We connect all the more when we know that we’re not the only ones struggling in this life. When you know that the person sitting next to you is going through the same storm and the same problem as you are, it kind of makes you feel that God also loves you. And God is fair. Am I correct in that? It makes you connect to know that hey, we’re the same. If the preacher in front of you whom God loves has some struggles that God is helping him to overcome, then maybe, just maybe, you will think, “God also loves me and God is also doing something about my trials.”
So, that’s the reason I’m sharing this.
You know, my good friend Mike Viñas, during our Christmas Light Group (Caring Group) meeting last December, asked me this question: “Bro, how did you know that you’re through a mid-life crisis?”
That’s a good question. Because how in the world would you know that you’re in a midlife crisis? Is there like a rapid test kit that you buy from the drugstore?
That will indicate whether you’ll test positive or negative. There’s none, right?
So, how in the world do you know what you’re going through in a midlife crisis? There are indicators and usually, the greatest indicator is your age. They say that it happens between 40 to 60 years old. So those of you who are in that range, you are at prime target for a midlife crisis. And just in case you’re over 60, you say you haven’t gone through it, that indicates only one thing: you’re in denial.
It’s a midlife crisis and I answered Mike this way: Because there are indicators.
The indicators are you go through depression. You go through an identity crisis. You go through struggles with your significant purpose.
And you know with me, here is my take. I’ll share with you and be a bit vulnerable– if that’s okay.
Root Cause of the Crisis
I noticed that there was a big change in my life in the last few months. During our last family vacation, we went to Singapore. My family– my wife Kristel and our two kids– Ethan and Ellie. For some reason, I was always mad during the trip. And I am not talking about, you know, just quick anger. I’m talking about the Incredible Hulk kind of temper.
Yung sabog ka. — You’re explosive. Have you experienced that? You just explode– like an atomic bomb. That happened to me.
And then when we came home, for some reason, there was another incident that also triggered my anger. I was so angry that I did not talk to anybody. I did not talk to mywife. I did not even talk to the kids. My anger lasted overnight. I kind of disobeyed the command of the apostle Paul who said don’t let the sun go down on your anger. That’s good advice, by the way.
So, the next day, I woke up at 5 a.m. and I felt that there was something wrong. Because, I mean, I’m not like this. For those of you who know me, you know I’m not like this. My family knows me and they know I’m not like this.
So, I was thinking, “Lord, what’s happening to me?”
And so, in my quiet time, while everybody was still asleep, I started reflecting on my life. And the more I reflected on my life, you know, the more I took a peek into my past, I realized that I’ve got a long history of anger management issues.
May I give you the context of why that even happened? Maybe some of you can relate to this…
I grew up in a loving home– but a very strict one. My dad was old-fashioned when it came to disciplining children. You know, he was old-school, the military- style discipline. In our household, my dad was the lord of all. His opinion was the only opinion that ever mattered. So, some of you are nodding, you’re relating to this. So, my dad was a good dad but he brought us up that way. And I know that was probably the way that he was also brought up.
Anger Management
That’s how I lived. When I became an adult,
I did not know that’s how I became– I did not know how to channel my anger. I did not know how to express it in the right way.
Some of you probably say, “That’s why Bro. Audee is always shouting when he’s preaching. Because he’s angryJ”
No, that’s not like it. It’s because I don’t know how to channel it. Whenever I feel something,
I don’t know how to tell people how I feel — especially to my loved ones.
And you know, I don’t know who this message is for today. But if there’s somebody here who can relate with me, and you are unable to express yourself, I want you to know this: God wants to heal you as well. Because the most dangerous — and I’m speaking this to myself– that can even happen is you give somebody who’s got issues, authority. That’s dangerous. Because he’s going to use that authority to abuse other people.
You don’t have to have a top position in leadership to make damage. All you’ve got to be is a parent. And you can still do damage to your children.
And so, that’s what we’re going to talk about today. It’s going to be a personal talk and I hope that you’re ready.
We’re going to break open God’s Word and I pray that this ministers to you the way that God has been using it to minister to me.
Everybody, lift your hands and sing with me:
Thy Word is a lamp unto my feet and a Light unto my path.
But you know, over time, I realized that because his opinion was only the one that mattered, I did not have a voice. My siblings and I grew up not being able to express how we felt and what we thought of because everything we would say he would contradict. We were always wrong.
Lessons from St. Paul
I am going to open the book of Philippians where Paul is speaking to the people of Philippi.
A beautiful message of encouragement as he is building his church.
Two lessons we can learn from this piece of Scripture:
Do you believe that God is faithful? Yes, He is.
Everybody say, “God is a finisher.” That’s right. Everything that God starts, He finishes. Everything that God creates, He completes.
Think about it: Everything that God created in this universe, He completed, right? He created from Day 1 to Day 6. He completed it and then He took a nap.
So, everything that God creates, He completes. You want evidence of that? Take a good look at the person beside you. Look at the person’s face: 2 eyes, 2 eyebrows, 2 ears, 1 nose, 1 mouth. What does that mean?
Balance. The Lord took His time to craft how you look. Imagine if the Lord suddenly became lazy… and He says, “Let’s not put 2 eyebrows anymore… Just 1.”
Wouldn’t that be ugly? When one of your eyebrows is thinning, you go and have a tattoo to balance your brows.
What if the Lord decides to play with His creation and says, “Let’s put the hole of the nose not inside but on top of the nose. That would be difficult. When you’re taking a bath, you’ll drown.
Everything that God creates, He completes.
Why We Don’t Feel Complete
You might say, “Bro. Audee, you say God completes everything He creates– but why is it that I’m created but I do not feel complete?”
I’ll give you two reasons.
God is unable to continue His work just like Paul promised because you’re too busy.
Busyness is the reason God’s work discontinues.
I’ll give you one example: My own life. I joined the Light of Jesus Family in 2008, and everything went so fast, everything went quickly. Within two months, I joined the Music Ministry. Within three months, I was part of a Light Group.
Within four months, I was part of all those pastoral programs. It was so amazing. God changed my schedule. I went through a complete overhaul. Everything was revolving around ministry and it was so wonderful.
But here’s the downside: I became too busy, and I was so focused on the ministry that all my unresolved issues had to be parked somewhere. And it’s only now that I’m realizing that I’ve got unresolved issues about my anger and that God is only starting His work again.
So, busyness– productivity– isn’t always progress. Think about it: 
Doctors will tell you when you have blockages in your artery, that’s bad. Why?
Because the blood is not flowing. You can die. It’s scary. Spiritual leaders will tell you the same thing. That if you’ve got blockages in your heart and in your spirit, that’s also dangerous. Because then the blessing and the grace of God will not flow into your life. So, I pray that we learn to be busy for the right reasons this year. But we also look within our life to see what blockages are still there — that we need to surrender to God today.
I want you to bow as I pray: Heavenly Father Thank You for this time that You have gathered all of us today in this brand- new year. We pray for a brand-new start. But more than that, Lords, we pray that this would be a fresh anointing. That all these issues that we have left behind untreated You will uncover and
You will finally heal. We acknowledge Your Presence, Lord. You are our great healer and our great physician. This is our prayer in Jesus’ Name. Amen.
One more time, Everybody, let’s sing to the Lord:
Thy Word is a Lamp unto my feet, and a Light unto my path.
Tell to the person beside you
Whatever God creates, He completes.
But take note: Before you arrive at completion, there are different levels that you have to go through. And I’ve come up with three levels that
I believe some of you already experienced. Levels that you go through before you are completed by God.
No. 1: Demolition. How many of you last year you felt like last year was very hard on your life? You know, you felt like there were things in your life that didn’t fall into place, and you felt like life was falling apart — you broke up with your partner, you lost the business… You ever felt like that last year?
That might be the Demolition stage. Where God allowed you to go through certain trials– not to hurt you but to refine you so that He could remove the things that are not of Him.
Or maybe for some of you, last year wasn’t so bad. Last year was great. Year 2023 was a blessed year for you. Yeah, you went through breakthroughs, business was good for some of you, maybe you opened a new business and now it’s succeeding. Maybe some of you went through a great relationship and things are going great.
That’s No. 2: Construction stage. Where God is constructing new levels in your life — new levels of growth. And praise God for that.
But maybe for some, the year 2023 was just okay. You stagnated; you plateaued in your spiritual life. Maybe you felt a bit of dryness. But maybe after a few months, you felt like there was a sudden surge of passion– a revival of sorts. Maybe it’s even going to come today for you.
That’s No. 3: Renovation stage. Where God is fixing you up and setting you up for a win.
Or maybe for some of you, this was the best stage. You felt happier last year than you ever were. Why? Because you started more and more like Jesus. You started loving like Jesus. You started giving like Jesus. You started forgiving like Jesus.
That’s No. 4: Completion stage. Where God’s Word is taking root in your life and you’re feeling the Word move you
You see, in every stage of our life, we go through various stages:
But here’s the thing: Why is it that we, as God’s creation, we’re not completed yet. I mean if God created the universe– He completed everything– why is it that all of us here are not fully completed?
Because think about this: When God created the world, from Day 1, He finished until Day 5. Who did he create last? On Day 6, God created Man.
What does that tell us? That when it comes to you and me, God is taking His sweet time.
So, what’s the message? Don’t rush. You don’t have to rush your progress. You don’t have everything completed right away. Because God is taking His sweet time with you.
What does that mean?
It means that you are
His greatest masterpiece.
Tell the person on your right, “You are a masterpiece in the making.” Tell the other person on your left, “You are a work in progress.”
That’s why when it comes to you and me, God is taking His sweet, sweet, Sweet time.
But how do we achieve, you know, this level of consciousness– that we have this life that we’re living and that we are connected with the Lord?
Here’s the answer: You need to start living a reflective life.
I will give you Three Reflection Questions that will help you start the year 2024.
Just like me– I had to ask myself these questions.
No. 1 Ask yourself: 
When I say reflective life, I’m not saying that you need to join seminary school, you need to be a monk, you need to pray every day for two hours to live a reflective life. No. Because all of us are busy– and that’s the truth.
You know how I do it? To live a reflective life? I have fewer distractions. We have so many noises and distractions in this world. So, what I do, whenever I have free time, I don’t always have to watch the latest dance craze on TikTok. I don’t always have to catch that viral video of that guy fighting in traffic. I live a reflective life. I start thinking where have I been.
Especially this year, it is going to be very good for you to start asking, “Where have I been?”
Because I believe we all have past inner wounds. Am I correct?
But did you know that who you are today is only a by-product of all the things that happened in your life? And you know, some of these wounds that accumulated in the past, some of them got healed. But most of them, a lot of them, are often untreated. And you learn how to sweep them under the rug. By living a reflective life and asking “Where have I been?” you start looking back at your life, and looking at the wounds that you have not yet owned. Wounds that you have not acknowledged.
Here’s the key: Perhaps the greatest gift that you can give yourself this year is to work on yourself.
Because if you can win from within, you can win all the battles in your life.
So, ask yourself that question again and again: “Where have I been?”
No. 2: Put your hand over your chest and say, “Where am I?”
Have you ever experienced driving along the freeway and you miss your exit? The worst that can happen is you miss your exit five meters away from it. So, you have no choice but to drive to the next exit — which is 15 kilometers away– for you to get back to where you started.
Did you know the journey in your life without asking “Where I am?” is the most reckless mistake that you can make? It’s reckless. Why? Because you can be moving forward but you don’t know that you’re moving toward the wrong destination.
I’ll give you a little principle that I learned and this is powerful.
It’s called the 1/8 Quarter of an Inch Principle. In rocket science, everything is supposed to be precise. Measurement is supposed to be precise.
For instance, what if one day the rocket scientists make a trip to, for instance, the sun– and they miscalculated their route by only 1/8 quarter of an inch…
How big is 1/8 quarter of an inch? It’s from the tip of your index finger up to the first of the lines on your finger. So, if they miscalculate the route toward the sun, they will be 40 million kilometers off course. Crazy, right?
If you apply that in your life, one day, you suddenly neglect taking care of your health. You eat and eat, you don’t exercise. Or maybe you forget to say “I love you” to your spouse. And you don’t say it anymore. You’re like, “Anyway, I already said it when we got married.” Or maybe you did not meet with your team anymore. You know if you keep doing that– again and again– one day will come when you will be completely off course from your destination.
But there is good news. The good news is it’s not too late to make a U-turn. It’s not too late to eat healthy again. It’s not too late to exercise again. It’s not too late to make amends again.
Justin Bieber asks that question. He sings: Is it too late to say sorry?
It’s not too late. Because you’re still breathing. Because you’re still alive.
As long as you’ve got breath, you can still say “Sorry”.
Now, on the other hand, if you are buried six feet underground, you know what the theme song will be? It’s too late to apologize.
So, as long as you are still breathing, my friend, it’s never too late to make a U-turn. It’s never too late to be a better husband. It’s never too late to be a better spouse. It’s never too late to become a good friend because there’s still a chance. And it starts by asking, “Where am I?”.
If I’m not where I’m supposed to be, it’s too late to realign myself to my God-given dreams.
No. 3: Where am I going?
You know if I relate this to what’s happening to my life today with my crisis, I can honestly say that it’s been a roller-coaster ride of up and down emotions and I’m glad that my wife journeys with me.
But in hindsight, this crisis is something that I’m grateful for. I mean, that sounds kind of weird, but if it were not for this crisis, God would not reveal my unresolved issues and my issues would still fester in my life.
Now, may I ask you that question: What is your crisis?
Maybe some of you, you’ve got a health crisis. Or maybe some of you, you’ve got a financial crisis. Or a relationship crisis, or a marital crisis.
Or a career crisis. What is your crisis?
Here is my advice… This is going to sound weird but it’s theologically sound– and this is going to bless you: Stay close to the crisis
What? Didn’t he just say stay to the crisis?
That’s right. Stay close to the crisis. What do I .mean by that?
Isn’t it true that when you’re in crisis mode, your focus is so good? You’re fighting for something. You’re so passionate. You’re so committed. A lot of us will often say– I don’t know if you’ve ever heard this– someone complained to you: “Sawang-sawa na ako sa ganito.– I’m so tired of this. Puro na lang ganito.
— It’s always like this.”
And then they have solutions to that problem. They’re able to solve the problem. But then things get a bit better, and then they go back to their self.
Your Choice: Crisis Can Be Your Calling
When you’ve got a crisis, my friend, you know that you’ve got to fight your way through that crisis. But when you stay close to your crisis, you’re going to dream big, you’re going to run as fast as you can.
So, that’s my advice. Don’t ever lose sight of your crisis:
Your life turned beautiful, you were able to pay your debts, but then you used your credit card again. Right?
You exercised, you lost 10 pounds. What did you do to celebrate? You ate a box of donuts.
Tell the person beside you, “That’s wrong.”
Stay close to your crisis– whatever that crisis is. Because that crisis will keep on pushing you forward, my friend.
Maybe your crisis can also be your calling, I don’t know. Because if your crisis becomes your calling, you stay so close to it that you can feel it every day. Because you want to change something. You want to change your life and you want to change the world. Amen.
Ethan’s Choice
We just recently had Christmas. Did you have a good Christmas? I want to take you back to 2020 with a little video about my son Ethan who was three yours old at that time.
And I asked him: “Son, what are you going to give Papa Jesus for His birthday?”
My son was three years old when I filmed that. He was so into construction vehicles. If you have children you know what it feels like when your kids are fixated on something — and usually, they go through a period when they’re into cars, into games.
Ethan was so much into construction vehicles. He knew all the vehicles. I had to learn about them so that I could align with his interests at that time. And you know, that’s a cute video, don’t you agree?
I mean as a parent, I really appreciated that I was able to take that video.
But you know, I had no idea that when I would watch that again and again, that God would speak to me through it. Because Ethan mentioned that what he wanted to give Jesus as gifts were a road roller, an excavator, a dump truck. What do they have in common? They’re all construction vehicles.
Jesus’ Choice
When you think about it, Jesus could have chosen any occupation in the world. He’s the Son of God. He could have been the greatest conqueror ever in this world. He could have been the richest ruler in this world Yet He chose the lowliest, humblest, simplest occupation. He became a carpenter.
When you think about carpentry, you might compare it with other professions– lawyer, doctor, pilot, all these hard courses that you need to take to have that kind of job.
Carpentry is such a very humble profession, right? But carpentry requires special skills. Because if you’ve got a bad carpenter, what will happen? You’ve got a bad foundation for your house. Have you ever seen a carpenter create a table with one leg just half of the other legs? That’s a bad table. So, for you to create a great house, you will need what you call a master carpenter.
Same thing in your life. Some of you, whenever you see that your house is getting dilapidated– the walls are falling apart, the paint is chipping away, the foundation is so bad– you look for a master carpenter.
But today, when you see that your life is falling apart– sin has overcome you, addictions are taking over in your life– you know what you need?
You need a Master Carpenter. I’ve got good news for you, my friend: Jesus is a Master Carpenter. He is.
Make this year a chance for God to continue the work He began in you.
I know you’re excited to start 2024. But what if there are stuff in your life in 2023– or even all the way back to when you were a child– that have not yet been resolved? What if this year is the year that you finally resolve all of these issues that you’ve been through? Because until you allow the work of the Lord to start in you again, it will never continue.
Paul says that God is faithful to continue His work. My prayer for all of you today is that you would allow God to continue the work that He started in you on Day 1. And to allow Him to not just continue this year but to complete you this year.
Are you ready to lay down the foundation in your life and to allow King Jesus to be the Master Carpenter over your life?
Lift both hands and let’s pray:
Father, You are here. And in Your Presence, we surrender our whole life to You– our past, our present. And ultimately, our future– Hold it with
Your mighty hands. We surrender all our issues, all our hurts, all our traumas, and all our pains into Your loving hands. Come, heal us. Come, transform us. Come, change us. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.
‘It Is Finished!’
Everybody not moving, keep still. This is your moment with God. Jesus is here. Whether or not you acknowledge it– that you have pains and traumas, and issues, and brokenness in your life– I want you to know that God sees them. He sees your sin. And I want you to know that you don’t have to carry that burden all by yourself– just like Bro. Bo said.
The truth of the matter is when Jesus came into life, He carried that sin for us and He nailed it to a Cross
So, when Jesus said on that Cross, “It is finished,” it simply means He has overcome sin. He has overcome the difficulties you’re carrying. He has overcome the burdens that you’re carrying.
Because Jesus already said, “It is finished,” it simply means He has prepared the way. He has prepared the path and all He’s doing right now, He is preparing you– Jesus is preparing you so that you walk that path with strength and with grace, and with courage.
Commitment
Everybody, lift your hands. I want you to say this prayer with me. This is going to be your anthem for 2024– to lay down your life to Jesus.
Everybody say:
Jesus, here I am. I am Your Child. And today, I declare that You are my God. I look at my past. I look at my present. And I look at my future. And I know that You’re there as You’ve always been. And I trust that You’ve got plans for me– plans of Hope, plans of Goodness, plans of Peace, plans of Joy.
And today, I declare that only You I will follow. Only You I will worship.
Only You I will love. Be my foundation. I build my life upon Your love.
In Jesus’ Name, I pray. Amen.
